January 5

"Sometimes you break your arm, and you try holding it together to help it heal, and other times you put it in a splint or a sling to aid the process. This time, I'm working on putting a cast around it so it will heal properly and nothing else can hurt it."

~Isaac, on his never ending relationship with some girl.

"We're not broken, just bent, and we can learn to love again." For how much I despise that song, it does hold a certain amount of truth. Most people see bent as not perfect and therefore not right, whereas the more experienced ones of us see bent as simply different and unique, and thus more lovable. The majority of those who look down upon the bent have never been touched, played with, scratched or even looked at properly in their love life to realize that from brokenness comes new bonds, and these new bonds are like scar tissue: stronger than what came before, albeit not as pretty.

While unblemished human muscle grows in a basket weave pattern, scar tissue grows back all in one direction. This is true of the human heart, head and spirit. You can't replicate innocence or your original feelings for someone if you've lost it or been hurt by them. There are hundreds of different ways to cope, and depending on how bad the 'injury,' you might be able to get back to how you originally were, like a cut on your arm leaving a small scar. But sometimes, you emotionally invest yourself in someone else and when that goes to shit the only way you can rebuild is by doing what you did before, replicating that time before your innocence was lost and before you had bad relations with that person: You need to love someone else to help that scar tissue heal. You need a cast to help your broken arm, because just letting it be might not heal properly.


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Hello there old angel,
tell me how has this hell been?
I hate to see our thoughts conflicting
because of how some things came to end
And I hate to see you hate yourself,
because I know you can not love
anyone but my heart
and that bridge went up in dust

Hello there old angel,
tell me how has this hell been?
Cause I've seen you hellbent on getting out
Without relying on earthly ends
And your friends have disappeared
Or were not friends at all
And I'm trying to help, God knows I am
Cause acting like our Savior is His greatest call

Hello there old angel,
tell me how has this hell been?
I'd like to put on my shiny wings
And we can listen to the chorus that never ends
I'd love to show you that city
stadia wide and miles high
of gold encrusted pearls and jewels
where we can together hide


but oh god oh god let me show you