January 23

I'd write about how angry, or sad, or happy, or emotional I am, but for the first time in a while, I feel nothing. Two nights ago I felt numb, but now, I don't even feel that. It's a strange feeling, feeling nothing. You expect it to be different, but you're just standing there, doing the dishes, and nothing seems different. You're not happy about tomorrow, nor sad about yesterday, but indifferent about everything. The looming, daunting semester simply exists. The prospect of a great weekend no longer excites you, nor does any combination of people or places. It's neither black nor white, just grey. No hills, no valleys. Life just is sometimes, and sometimes being is all you can do.